Skip to content
The Sapphic Sanctuary

late bloomer lesbian with no experience. where do you start

5 replies226 views
Nell
Original post

Nell

31. came out to myself in June. every relationship before that was a man, and "relationship" is generous for two of them. i downloaded HER, wrote "hey", and got nothing back, which feels correct.

late bloomer lesbian with no experience

i don't know how to flirt without it sounding like a customer service email. i don't know who pays. i don't know if saying "i've never dated a woman" on date one is honest or a warning label.

dating women after only dating men

people keep saying get friends first. i have two friends and they are straight and busy. if the app is a bad place to start, where's the actual first step that isn't "love yourself" in cursive.

Related reading: Community Guidelines · Contact the moderators · Who is welcome at The Sapphic Sanctuary? · Do I need to be sure of my sexuality to call myself sapphic? · Questioning · Late bloomer

Replies

5 replies

  • Gwen

    Gwen

    Tuesday hike, coffee after, nobody is grading you. i was bad at flirting for a year and the hike still let me show up. say you've got no practice if it comes up. it's a fact, not a warning label.

  • Lane

    Lane

    "hey" with nothing after it is why you got silence. one specific line. "your photo at the lake, was that the cold one or are you just like that." then stop typing. the essay opener reads like a cover letter.

  • Helen

    Helen

    i was 44 with a marriage behind me and the same blank. who pays: whoever asked, unless you agreed otherwise. saying you're new on date one was a relief for me. one woman was weird about it. the next one wasn't. you only need the next one.

  • Nell

    Nell

    deleting the hey drafts. looking up whether this city has a Tuesday thing that isn't a bar. if it's a hike i will be slow and annoying. you've been warned, Gwen.

  • Gwen

    Gwen

    slow is the pace. annoying is optional.

Reply to thread

Sign in to reply

You need an account before you can join the discussion.

Posts by participant

Share of posts in this thread

  • Gwen

    Gwen

    33%

    2 posts

  • Nell

    Nell

    33%

    2 posts

  • Helen

    Helen

    17%

    1 post

  • Lane

    Lane

    17%

    1 post

6 posts total · top 4 shown

Forum stats

Members
106
Topics
194
Posts
934
Views
93k

18 posts in the last 24 hours

Active today